On Sunday, Colin McEnrore wrote a hilarious piece for the Hartford Courant regarding the current crop of candidates for governor.
There are at least 15 possible candidates for governor, and getting really excited about any of these candidacies is like buying one of those pet turtles from Woolworth's, in the sense that any one may very well be dead in its little plastic dish by the time you get back from the store with the delicious shrimp flakes.
In 1987, the early Democratic presidential field was called "the seven dwarfs," which was both a reflection on their unimpressive sameness and a reminder that the extremely tall Bill Bradley was not running.
Here in 2010, the sheer number of candidates would be less daunting if we gave them catchy dwarf names. Henceforth then, they are Crazy Eyes, Big Stupid, Robot Man, Overbite, Rich Uncle Pennybags, M-Fed, Oz, Jar-Jar the Mango Man, Grampa D, Puppetmaster, The Anti-DiBella, The Bald Avenger, Universal Man and Nobody Could Possibly Think of a Catchy Nickname For Gary LeBeau. Collect them! Trade them!
Now that I've listed them, I have to admit they seem less like dwarfs and more like a coalition of third-rate comic book characters. The Legion of Run-Down Superheroes. I'm also refusing to provide any key that would identify all of them, just to cut down on libel actions. I also acknowledge that at least one of those appellations is deeply unfair. Boo-Boo would be a perfectly acceptable catchy dwarf nickname for Gary LeBeau.
Although his entire post should be required reading, his post got me to thinking, since McEnroe won't identify the identity of his nicknames, although I have my choice, I thought it would be good if you the reader pick which name you think McEnroe gave our mayor?
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